PERTH 行车习惯总结

bankids · 发表于 2007-1-21 14:16:10

BASIC RULES FOR DRIVING IN PERTH

1. Indicators will give away your next move. A real Perth driver never uses them.

2. Under no circumstances should you leave a safe distance between you and the car in front of you, or somebody else will fill in that space, putting you in an even more dangerous situation.

3. Crossing two or more lanes in a single lane change is considered "going with the flow."

4. The faster you drive through a red light, the less chance you have of getting hit.

5. Never get in the way of an older car that needs extensive repairs. The other guy doesn't have anything to lose.

6. Braking is to be done as hard and as late as possible to ensure that your ABS kicks in, giving a nice, relaxing foot massage as the brake pedal pulsates. For those of you without ABS, it's a chance to stretch your legs.

7. Speed limits are arbitrary figures, given only as suggestions and apparently not enforceable in the metro area during rush hour.

8. Please remember that there is no such thing as a shortcut during rush-hour traffic in Perth.

9. Always slow down and rubberneck when you see an accident or even someone changing a tyre.

10. Everybody thinks their vehicle is better than yours, especially 4WD drivers.

11. Learn to swerve abruptly. Perth is the home of High-Speed Slalom Driving thanks to Main Roads, which puts potholes in key locations to test drivers' reflexes and keep them on their toes, not forgetting the 'Test your skill' chicanes in suburbs.

12. It is traditional in Perth to honk your horn at cars that don't move the instant the light changes.

13. Seeking eye contact with another driver revokes your right of way.

14. Never take a green light at face value. Always look right and left before proceeding.

15. Remember that the goal of every Perth driver is to get there first, by whatever means necessary.

16. Real Perth women drivers can put on pantyhose and apply eye makeup at 75 kph in bumper-to-bumper traffic.

17. Real Perth men drivers can remove pantyhose and a bra at 95 kph in bumper-to-bumper traffic.

18. Heavy fog and rain are no reasons to change any of the previously listed rules. These weather conditions are God's way ensuring a natural selection process and creating a need for panel beaters, junkyards, and new vehicle sales. It is an acceptable practice to increase your speed in comparison to the rate of rain fall, i.e.: the harder it rains, the faster you go.

19. There is a commonly held belief in Perth that high-speed tailgating in heavy traffic reduces petrol consumption as you get sucked along in the slipstream of the car in front.

20. It's OK to cut off fully loaded semi-trailers, road trains and buses because, hell - they have brakes.

21. It is an essential duty of the driver to preserve the life of his passengers. Hence no matter how much of an inconvenience it may be, always find a detour around The Causeway, The Narrows, and Guildford

22. Always anticipate oncoming traffic while driving down a one-way street.

23. It's O.K when driving in Northbridge to air your grievances at bad drivers by giving the "one finger salute" while screaming out "#%*#". However, it is imperative you are driving at least a 5-litre V8 with a crow bar in your lap.

24. Perth drivers are experts at merging, when in two or more lanes travelling in the same direction, ensure that if you see someone politely indicating, waiting slowly trying to merge into your lane, show them that they must 'Wait their turn' to use your lane. Speed up, try to cut them off, should they succeed and get into your lane never mind that it was actually legal for them to do that, ensure that your flash your lights, honk your horn, use extreme hand gestures, even tailgate them, just to let them know, IT WAS YOUR LANE.

25. Ensure that when merging into traffic travelling at any more than 40kph that you stop in the merging lane, backing up traffic for miles behind you, ensuring that you have given yourself or no-one else that opportunity to merge. Again, forget that the traffic handbook states that you should speed up to meet traffic speed then merge. If you are travelling in a lane near a merge lane, don't change lanes to make it easy for them, instead see rule 24, after all they deserve it.

26. While using Perth roundabouts, particularly two lane roundabouts, ENSURE that you are in the left lane to turn right, or the right to turn left, hell lets keep those people in those other lanes on their toes.

27. If you are an TransPerth bus driver, you must win at all costs, getting to your destination prior to any other driver is life and death. Never worry about your passengers bouncing round in the back like tennis

balls, hell it's a cheap form of theme park, in fact Perth's very own.

28. Perth taxis, see rule 27, except you are now qualifying for the GMC 400.

29. Pedestrian crossings - What are they?

30. If you are a cyclist, remember YOU ARE INVINCIBLE, you are stronger than ANY vehicle travelling at speed, MAKE SURE you take the whole lane for yourself, and at night NEVER use lights, remember They Will See You!

bankids · 发表于 2007-1-21 14:59:11

懒得看英文的我翻译一下

BASIC RULES FOR DRIVING IN PERTH

1.使用转向灯会让你失去换道的机会, 真正的配丝司机从来不用转向灯

2. 在任何情况下都不可以和前车保持安全距离, 因为有人会钻进你前面的空隙造成更危险的情况.

3. 一次换道动作换2-3条道被认为是 "行车流畅."

4. 你过交通灯的速度越快,你被撞到的机会越小.

5.千万不要开在破烂车的前面,他们撞了也没损失.

6. 刹车要越晚越近越好,这样才能让ABS介入, 让抖动的刹车踏板给你的脚做舒适轻松的马沙鸡. 那些没有ABS的,这是做伸展运动的好机会.

7. 限速只是主观推断,只供参考但不可能在上下班高峰期没人鸟它.

8. 在配丝的上下班高峰期,没有近路一说.

9. 前方有事故,甚至只是在换个轮胎, 都会减速然后探头去看个究竟.

10. 每个人都觉得他们的车比你的好,特别是4轮驱的司机.

11. Learn to swerve abruptly. Perth is the home of High-Speed Slalom Driving thanks to Main Roads, which puts potholes in key locations to test drivers' reflexes and keep them on their toes, not forgetting the 'Test your skill' chicanes in suburbs.

12. 在陪丝, 绿灯了没马上走会被别人按喇叭是一项传统.

13. Seeking eye contact with another driver revokes your right of way.

14. Never take a green light at face value. Always look right and left before proceeding.

15. 记住陪丝司机的目标就是第一个到达目的地,不管怎样都要!

16. 真正的陪丝女司机可以在前车贴后车的交通状况下开75码的同时穿裤子并化装.

17. 真正的陪丝男司机可以在前车贴后车的交通状况下开75码的同时脱女人的裤子和奶罩.

18. 浓雾暴雨都不会影响前面任何一条.天气状况上只是上帝保证自然选择和给修车厂,废车厂和新车车行创收的一种途径, 人民会随着下雨量的大小而增加自己的车速, 雨月大车越快.

19. 陪丝有一种说法，在繁忙的交通状况下,高速行驶的大卡车可以减少汽油消耗-- 你被你车前的卡车产生的涡流给往前吸.

20. 超满载的拖挂车,大型卡车,巴士都是没有问题的，因为他们有刹车

21. 保护身边的乘客是司机的必要任务,因此无论多麻烦, 总是绕道而不走河边,堤道,窄路等等。

22. 在单行线逆行的时候提防对面来车.

23. 在北桥开车可以树着手指大喊#$%#%^来发泄别人对自己SB司机的评价.当然你必须是在一辆至少V8 5升发动机的车里,还得有大包围.

24. 陪丝的司机都是并道高手,当有2-3个车道往同一个方向行驶的时候,确保你看到有人礼貌的打转向灯, 漫漫的等着并到你这边. 然后秀给他们看他们必须呆在自己的车道等着转过来用你的车道, 加速, Perth drivers are experts at merging, when in two or more lanes travelling in the same direction, ensure that if you see someone politely indicating, waiting slowly trying to merge into your lane, show them that they must 'Wait their turn' to use your lane. Speed up, try to cut them off, should they succeed and get into your lane never mind that it was actually legal for them to do that, ensure that your flash your lights, honk your horn, use extreme hand gestures, even tailgate them, just to let them know, IT WAS YOUR LANE.

25. Ensure that when merging into traffic travelling at any more than 40kph that you stop in the merging lane, backing up traffic for miles behind you, ensuring that you have given yourself or no-one else that opportunity to merge. Again, forget that the traffic handbook states that you should speed up to meet traffic speed then merge. If you are travelling in a lane near a merge lane, don't change lanes to make it easy for them, instead see rule 24, after all they deserve it.

26. 在陪司的转盘处, 特别是双线大转盘,确保你从左道右转,右道左转,让别的司机去呆在自己的车道吧.

27. 如果你是陪司工交的司机,你必须在其他任何司机之前到达目的地.无论付出多大代价,甚至生死. 千万别介意车后的乘客晃的跟网球似的乱弹. 这简直是廉价版的主题公元. 也是陪丝才有的.

28. 陪丝的出租车,同27条,除非你正在对GMC 400 进行资格认证?.

29. 人行横道线--是什么东西???

30. 如果你骑自行车,记得你是坚不可摧的,比任何机动车都强悍,必须得霸占整条行车道,晚上绝对不要开灯,他们看的到你!