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标题: 笑掉大牙的幽默笑话,请捂着嘴看 [打印本页]

作者: eta66    时间: 2013-6-3 23:09
标题: 笑掉大牙的幽默笑话,请捂着嘴看
1、   “老板,这件夹克多少钱?”
  “1000”
  “卧槽,这么贵,那旁边这个呢?”
  “那件新款,两个卧槽。”
  2、
  “老板,这件衣服多少钱?”
  “15块!”
  “老板你会不会做生意啊?还让不让别人砍价了!”
  3、
  到菜市场买菜,看到一个孩子在看摊,我问:“一只鸡多少钱?”
  那孩子回答:“23。”
  我又问:“两只鸡多少钱?”
  孩子愣了一下,一时间没算过来,急中生智大吼一声:“一次只能买一只!”
  4、
  网上买了双雪地靴,发现穿上不好看,抱怨道:看模特穿上挺好看的,自己穿上真难看。
  老公:淘宝上的雪地靴模特都不穿裤子,穿起来当然好看了!
  5、
  一天早上,一位先生在湖边钓鱼,他等呀等,鱼就是不上钩。
  到了下午,他肚子有点饿了,就到附近的餐馆吃东西。
  先生:“你们这有什么东西吃?”
  服务员:“有糖醋鱼、
  红烧鱼、
  干炸鱼、
  清蒸鱼,还有……”
  那位先生自言自语地说:“怪不得湖里没鱼呢!”
  6、
  这段时间,我买了一套“星期袜”,就是那种写有1到7的数字的袜子,代表星期一到星期天。这样,每天换袜子就能记住是星期几。
  前几天,看见同事老徐也穿了一双类似的袜子,上面的数字却是9。
  我说:“还有星期九?”
  老徐说:“这不是到九月份了嘛。”
  7、
  打野鸭的猎手一连几个小时等着野鸭露面。
  终于一只孤鸭飞了过来,除了那个喝醉的,别人都没打中。
  同伴问他究竟是怎么射中的。
  他道:“这有什么难的,飞来那么一大群,随便一枪就能打到。
  8、
  手和脚在对话。
  脚对手说:“事实上,我们主人喜欢你多过喜欢我。”。
  手不解地问:“凭什么这样说?”。
  脚:“不是吗,人人都希望自己有手气,而讨厌有脚气。”
  9、
  晚上老婆洗衣服,我站旁边陪她说话!
  老婆指着胸罩说:你看都破了!
  我说:扔了吧,明天陪你买新的!
  老婆想想说:恩,你看里面的海绵好好的,抽出来留着洗碗吧!。。。
  10、
  老婆新买了一件衣服。我问多少钱,老婆犹豫了一下,说:“我怕一石激起千层浪。”
  我说:“啥价钱也不至于起千层浪啊,不过打了个水漂而已。”
  老婆:“老公,你今天表现真是太爷们儿了,实话告诉你吧,三千!”
  我努力让自己平复下来,舒展开眉头说:“唉,三千块钱就这么打水漂了。”
  11、
  我问他:老公,你嫌我丑不?
  本以为老公会说:宝贝一点都不丑。
  结果他扔下俩字:不嫌。。
作者: lynn134402    时间: 2013-6-7 11:29
大牙还在
作者: yamme    时间: 2013-6-13 17:28
哈哈哈哈
作者: 水晶飘雪    时间: 2013-6-14 13:11
哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈
作者: lily2006    时间: 2013-7-5 17:07
he he he
作者: women    时间: 2013-7-6 21:04
bvcnbvdj
作者: women    时间: 2013-7-6 21:04
dgfnbnv
作者: women    时间: 2013-7-17 16:55
牛气冲天 嘎嘎嘎嘎 哈哈哈哈 哇哇哇哇 嘻嘻嘻嘻 呵呵呵呵
作者: women    时间: 2013-7-17 17:54
哈哈哈哈
作者: hehemeimei    时间: 2013-7-26 19:04
hhhhhhhhhhhh
作者: guozelin    时间: 2013-7-31 22:02
哈哈哈哈
作者: women    时间: 2013-8-2 20:25
,hahaha
作者: fujun    时间: 2013-8-4 10:03
HAHAHA
作者: fujun    时间: 2013-8-4 10:03
XDDDDD
作者: vself    时间: 2013-8-5 00:06
qweqwe
作者: fujun    时间: 2013-8-9 21:02
wrethrjhg
作者: fujun    时间: 2013-8-9 21:03
hahahahahaha
作者: fujun    时间: 2013-8-9 21:04
哈哈
作者: 99741    时间: 2013-8-17 09:39
hahahaha
作者: 海边人    时间: 2013-8-17 11:43
哈哈。,实话实话
作者: 海边人    时间: 2013-8-17 11:43
继续顶一下吧
作者: 海边人    时间: 2013-8-17 11:43
回来再看
作者: 海边人    时间: 2013-8-17 11:48
顶~~~
作者: 海边人    时间: 2013-8-17 11:48
继续。。。。。
作者: 海边人    时间: 2013-8-17 11:48
网速好快啊。。。哇咔咔
作者: 海边人    时间: 2013-8-17 11:49
灌水灌水
作者: 99741    时间: 2013-8-18 17:43
hehehe
作者: sunway    时间: 2013-8-20 22:28
yayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayayaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
作者: guozelin    时间: 2013-9-29 14:22
发反复反复反复反复反复反复反复
作者: cicioojintan    时间: 2013-9-29 21:53
hahahahahahahaha
作者: alicepan    时间: 2013-9-30 00:29
哈哈哈哈
作者: sunway    时间: 2013-9-30 11:11
hehehehehehehehehehehehe.........................
作者: guozelin    时间: 2013-10-4 23:46
男男女女难男男女女
作者: women    时间: 2013-10-6 14:54
njjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj                                     jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj





























































































































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j
作者: alicepan    时间: 2013-10-8 09:56
hahahaha
作者: guozelin    时间: 2013-10-8 19:36
去去去去去去去
作者: lily2006    时间: 2013-10-8 21:05
很好笑,谢谢
作者: li_rong1524    时间: 2013-10-9 07:40
有意思
作者: women    时间: 2013-10-27 10:39
  “老板,这件夹克多少钱?” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  “1000” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  “卧槽,这么贵,那旁边这个呢?” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  “那件新款,两个卧槽。” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  2、 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  “老板,这件衣服多少钱?” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  “15块!” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  “老板你会不会做生意啊?还让不让别人砍价了!” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  3、 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  到菜市场买菜,看到一个孩子在看摊,我问:“一只鸡多少钱?” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  那孩子回答:“23。” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  我又问:“两只鸡多少钱?” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  孩子愣了一下,一时间没算过来,急中生智大吼一声:“一次只能买一只!” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  4、 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  网上买了双雪地靴,发现穿上不好看,抱怨道:看模特穿上挺好看的,自己穿上真难看。 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  老公:淘宝上的雪地靴模特都不穿裤子,穿起来当然好看了! AUPEOPLEweb.com
  5、 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  一天早上,一位先生在湖边钓鱼,他等呀等,鱼就是不上钩。 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  到了下午,他肚子有点饿了,就到附近的餐馆吃东西。 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  先生:“你们这有什么东西吃?” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  服务员:“有糖醋鱼、 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  红烧鱼、 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  干炸鱼、 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  清蒸鱼,还有……” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  那位先生自言自语地说:“怪不得湖里没鱼呢!” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  6、 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  这段时间,我买了一套“星期袜”,就是那种写有1到7的数字的袜子,代表星期一到星期天。这样,每天换袜子就能记住是星期几。 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  前几天,看见同事老徐也穿了一双类似的袜子,上面的数字却是9。 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  我说:“还有星期九?” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  老徐说:“这不是到九月份了嘛。” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  7、 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  打野鸭的猎手一连几个小时等着野鸭露面。 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  终于一只孤鸭飞了过来,除了那个喝醉的,别人都没打中。 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  同伴问他究竟是怎么射中的。 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  他道:“这有什么难的,飞来那么一大群,随便一枪就能打到。 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  8、 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  手和脚在对话。 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  脚对手说:“事实上,我们主人喜欢你多过喜欢我。”。 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  手不解地问:“凭什么这样说?”。 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  脚:“不是吗,人人都希望自己有手气,而讨厌有脚气。” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  9、 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  晚上老婆洗衣服,我站旁边陪她说话! AUPEOPLEweb.com
  老婆指着胸罩说:你看都破了! AUPEOPLEweb.com
  我说:扔了吧,明天陪你买新的! AUPEOPLEweb.com
  老婆想想说:恩,你看里面的海绵好好的,抽出来留着洗碗吧!。。。 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  10、 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  老婆新买了一件衣服。我问多少钱,老婆犹豫了一下,说:“我怕一石激起千层浪。” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  我说:“啥价钱也不至于起千层浪啊,不过打了个水漂而已。” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  老婆:“老公,你今天表现真是太爷们儿了,实话告诉你吧,三千!” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  我努力让自己平复下来,舒展开眉头说:“唉,三千块钱就这么打水漂了。” AUPEOPLEweb.com
  11、 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  我问他:老公,你嫌我丑不? AUPEOPLEweb.com
  本以为老公会说:宝贝一点都不丑。 AUPEOPLEweb.com
  结果他扔下俩字:不嫌。。AUPEOPLEweb.com
作者: megan    时间: 2013-11-6 14:51
HHH
作者: alicepan    时间: 2013-11-7 14:52
Hahaha
作者: women    时间: 2013-11-23 08:58
大牙还在
作者: 神行者    时间: 2013-11-25 21:10
哈哈哈
作者: 953415423    时间: 2013-11-26 21:31
真有意思啊哈哈哈
作者: women    时间: 2014-2-13 20:34
哈哈哈哈AUPEOPLEweb
作者: gaodelu    时间: 2014-3-31 11:30
good jok
作者: 漂泊21载    时间: 2014-3-31 21:42
牙在
作者: aioexpress    时间: 2014-4-1 11:13
有点意思




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